I still love you. I'm sorry. I can't help myself.
Should I say this?
" I FUCKING MISS YOU "
NO, that's the thing. But the main thing now is, I could never move on. I mean like, I fucking love him so fregging much. Hm. I know, this is crazy. He is really something that I should hold on to. Something that really could put a light on my face. And now I have to let him go, wow. NOOOOOOOO! It's like putting a fucking stone on my head. It's hard for me to let him go easily :( x
Look, I've been fighting with this fucking feelings and I really tried to forget him but I have no fucking idea how much I struggled just to keep my lips liddis ---> (: but still inside of me chose to do this ---> ): Mannn, I pretend to be happy so that he could see that I'm happy without him by my side. When I said, we will never be together anymore. I fucking lied. I really hope that one day you will be mine again. I'm full with this shit ego inside of me and I just couldn't say it out. I hate this, I swear.
It's fucking torturing me and I'm following the order. I don't even take any sleeping pills eventho I know it's hard to sleep and rest while his in your head, running around like a song. Never leave. And how can I sleep without his good night wish. Hm. But I push my fucking eyes to forget about it and go sleep, trust me it's useless, you know what I did? I re-read all his old text and just imagine he's smiling at me like he have doing. See, it's hurt as fuck, can die I fucking swear. My god, mannnnn! I just hope you'll saying that you love me always and forever.
Don't you know I'm currently suffering to death just I couldn't fucking move on? I've been crying my tits off these days, I'm thinking about you every fucking second. I'm worried about myself just because I'm the one who thinking about this. You have no idea how much I care about you. I might sound like over protective but seriously get the fuck off it, I don't give a shit. I just fucking love you, don't you see that? I miss to hear your voice, have a conversations with you, say that i miss you and love you. I miss all that. I miss my prince :(
But what should I say? What can I do? The heart says what words can't explain itself. Now you're gone and you said that we just a memory. How easy you can move on like that? Seriously I'm not even understand. But still, I can't keep my mind off you, this is fucked up. I miss you I guess ): But don't worry, I'll get over you. One day, one day, I will. My heart, my mind always said that you still love me. I won't wash you away from my mind but I'll just live my life and our memories will be kept in this heart which always yours now and forever. I put a high hope on you. I want you to be my prince again to make me smile like you always do. I love you. x